Another part of my life is spent as a movie producer and I’m currently shooting a new film. Today was actually the first day of shooting and after one shot, the rain caused us call the day to a close. It took two hours to set that first shot and an hour of re-takes to get it right and all in-between scattered drops of rain. Finally, it looked to go on raining for the rest of the day. We have re-scheduled that scene for a later day. Tomorrow an even larger group of actors and crew assemble at another location for the next scene and we’ll do it again. No rain is forecast. It will be a good day.
But then again, today was a good day; Working with friends, using skills honed over years of practice, drinking coffee and watching it rain. Best job in the world.
I sometimes wonder as I get older if the day will come to stop doing those enjoyable tasks we call our occupation. I expect that day will come brought about by some external force. How will I react? How will I process the change? What will replace it?
I think… well I think two things. First, I can overthink the future and second, always have a Plan B. Or if no plan, at least consider the possibilities.
Around this notion of considering the possibilities, I and my colleagues at UTMB made a film. I briefly mentioned how I used the film in a men’s group discussion on Week 33 – More on Grief – http://wp.me/pH3Dx-3R. The film is about Miguel Navarro who is a man who loves his job as a horse trainer. Miguel develops a fungus infection in his lungs from moldy hay in the barn. He is taken by paramedics to the hospital for emergency care and later a respiratory therapist visits him at his work on the horse farm. Miguel may have to give up his job to protect his health. Take a look at his story below and consider how similar circumstance might affect you.
Miscellaneous
My wife, Dianne, recommends the following two books about women and aging.
- When I Am an Old Woman I Shall Wear Purple. Sandra Martz, Ed. Paper-Mache Press, Watsonville, California, 1987.
- If I Had My Life to Live Over: I Would Pick More Daisies. Sandra Martz, Ed. Paper-Mache Press, Watsonville, California, 1992.
Join us for a real-time discussion about questions raised by this essay on Tuesday from 12:00 p.m. to 12:45 p.m. See Discussion and SL tabs above for details. Link to the virtual meeting room: http://tinyurl.com/cjfx9ag.
Rodger Marion, Ph.D. is UTMB Distinguished Teaching Professor and Senior Fellow in the Sealy Center on Aging. Those with time on their hands might want to follow his current film project at http://nudgedmovie.com
Rodger Marion 
December 17, 2013 at 4:03 pm
Transcript – Weekly Discussion on Aging – Held in Second Life – 12-17-13
[09:57] Rodger Markova: Hello Thinker
[09:59] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): Hi Tim
[09:59] Tim (tskillian Resident): Hi
[10:04] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): Here is a link to the blog: http://virtualoutworlding.blogspot.com/
[10:05] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): I will send Rodger a poster of the blogpost — will post in a few days
[10:06] Tim (tskillian Resident): Have you had a chance to explore the Virtual State fair on Morrill island much?
[10:08] Rodger Markova: Please give me the SLURL again and I’ll make it a point this week
[10:08] Tim (tskillian Resident): ok — let me look it up real quick — http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Morrill/151/14/24
[10:10] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): here is an article I did about that location: http://virtualoutworlding.blogspot.com/2011/08/edu-stech-extension-virtual-state-fair.html
[10:11] Rodger Markova: Today’s topic is about occupation. The meaningful ways we use our time and how we adapt as disability appears
[10:12] Rodger Markova: The movie is about an older man who may have to give up his profession due to workplace related health threats
[10:14] Tim (tskillian Resident): I could feel the gentleman’s frustration.
[10:14] Rodger Markova: Yes, my father went thru much the same when his stroke eliminated his ability to do fine watch repair.
[10:15] Tim (tskillian Resident): And also understand the difficulty healthcare pros likely have in regard to communicating with him
[10:15] Rodger Markova: Yes, it’s not just facts is it?
[10:15] Tim (tskillian Resident): How old was your father.
[10:16] Rodger Markova: He was 81 when he had his stroke and he died at 93
[10:16] Rodger Markova: As he could never adapt he had 12 years of frustration and anger
[10:16] Tim (tskillian Resident): He was still repairing watches at 80 — wow. I could see how that would be a big loss.
[10:17] Rodger Markova: He was a genius with watch repair
[10:17] Tim (tskillian Resident): So, he could never adapt? That sounds really hard.
[10:18] Tim (tskillian Resident): I have a friend — who is 60 — who I think will soon have this difficulty.
[10:18] Rodger Markova: No. he could never really come to terms with his loss of motor control and it was very frustrating
[10:18] Tim (tskillian Resident): It becomes part of your identity.
[10:18] Tim (tskillian Resident): When that is lost, it is hard to rebuild
[10:19] Rodger Markova: yes and identity was the central theme wanted to focus on
[10:20] Rodger Markova: Why is it that people, especially men, identify so much with what they do?
[10:20] Tim (tskillian Resident): I think it provides meaning to their lives, it is something that makes them different from others.
[10:20] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): Ask anyone to tell you who they are —
[10:21] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): see what answer you get
[10:21] Tim (tskillian Resident): the answer is usually their job or career
[10:21] Rodger Markova: True
[10:22] Tim (tskillian Resident): I also think the gender difference in identity and how people cope with loss is very interesting. It seems harder for men.
[10:22] Rodger Markova: yes, I agree
[10:23] Tim (tskillian Resident): It probably should not be surprising that men invest so much in career
[10:24] Tim (tskillian Resident): years and years of socialization into putting your identity into your career.
[10:24] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): Some women may answer in terms of the husbands career
[10:25] Rodger Markova: I have seen that, but not so much now
[10:25] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): fewer these days
[10:25] Tim (tskillian Resident): i think there is more variability in women
[10:25] ThinkererSelby Evans (Thinkerer Melville): They have their own career
[10:27] Tim (tskillian Resident): I think they have multiple roles
[10:27] Rodger Markova: True
[10:27] Tim (tskillian Resident): and are able to draw from the diversity in their identity
[10:28] Tim (tskillian Resident): maybe that is a source of strength that us men could learn. 🙂
[10:28] Rodger Markova: Yes, I was wondering what might be a good male strategy here
[10:29] Tim (tskillian Resident): Men too have multiple roles, but we seem to devalue those based on relationships — at leas compared to women.
[10:31] Rodger Markova: I wonder… men have good friends and build strong bonds, so are those somehow different from women’s relationships?
[10:33] Tim (tskillian Resident): I think men do have strong relationships, but fewer of them — at least broadly speaking.
[10:33] Rodger Markova: I’d agree with that
[10:34] Tim (tskillian Resident): good — thinker. I look forward to reading your blog, but I do have to go.
[10:35] Tim (tskillian Resident): Thanks again Rodger.
[10:35] Rodger Markova: Bye